


Remus Lupin and the Computational Error: Redshirts

by pisoprano



Series: Remus Lupin and the Computational Error: Early Chapter Postings [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Metafiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-06
Updated: 2015-01-06
Packaged: 2018-03-05 14:17:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3123257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pisoprano/pseuds/pisoprano
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And now Chapter 8 is acting up too?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Remus Lupin and the Computational Error: Redshirts

DISCLAIMER: All levels of this story are fictional, though there is a seed of truth sometimes. And JK Rowling and most other relevant people in the publishing world still don't know that this story exists.

* * *

"My characters were...rebelling against something...My own bad writing. I wouldn't do for my characters what they needed for me to do—be courageous enough in my writing to make them interesting."

Redshirts

* * *

Back at the Well of Lost Plots. Though this time Remus was still a werewolf. That might make things interesting.

He wandered around for a bit, though the place was so nondescript that he had no idea where he was or where he was going. After an indeterminate period of time that was much too long, he finally ran into Lysander.

"Remus! What are you doing back here?"

Since Remus was still a werewolf and thus still lacked a voice, he knelt to the ground and started writing in the dirt. Wait, where did that dirt come from? Never mind, there was more important things to worry about.

 _It was either come back or get my mind raided by Voldemort_ , Remus wrote.

"Well the number two rule of time-travel is to not get caught by Voldemort," Lysander noted.

Remus cocked his head and motioned Lysander to tell him the number one rule.

"Rule number one is obviously to not prevent yourself from being born!" Lysander declared. "Of course, with our method, you don't have to worry about that one so much. So good on you for getting away from the snakeman. Though bad on you for ending up like that in the first place."

 _So do you know where my author friend went?_ Remus wrote. _I need to see Blair again._

"If you think about him enough he'll show up. And why exactly are you writing instead of talking? Make a vow of silence or something?"

Wasn't it obvious that Remus was a werewolf right now? But on second thought, wasn't this how the Well worked? Lysander expected Remus to look like a man, so he did, even when Remus perceived himself to be otherwise. And if that was the case...

Remus stood up, instantly becoming a human again instead of having to shift back. Not going through any transformation pain was nice. "Sorry, I came here during the full moon."

"Makes sense," Lysander nodded. "So what have you been up to lately?"

It had only been a month, but it had been fairly productive and Remus had plenty to tell Lysander about. While talking about fighting Dolohov at Voldemort's, he noticed that the author of  _Hairy Snout, Human Heart_  had shown up.

"Is there any particular reason you're both wearing red shirts?" the author asked.

Remus looked down. He hadn't thought about clothes when changing back, but now that the thought occurred to him, he was indeed wearing a red shirt.

"You seeded that thought, didn't you?" Remus asked.

"I'm not sure what you're talking about," the author replied and Remus wasn't sure if he was being facetious or not. It was hard to tell the author's inflection, being nondescript and all.

"We're all going to die!" Lysander declared.

"Never mind that," Remus said before Lysander could get going on yet another of his tangents. "Can you take me back to the Outlands? I need to see Blair again."

"He's not going to give you what you want this time," the author told him. "You need to try someone higher."

"The interloper?" Remus guessed. "Do you know how to find him?"

"Her," the author corrected. "And yes. She's also in the Outlands, so let's go."

"You'd better not be trying to wriggle out of a goodbye again," Lysander said as he grabbed Remus in for a hug.

"No, of course not," Remus said. "Although this might be a 'until we meet again' with my track record."

"Point."

* * *

Remus, after taking a fairly lengthy trip through the Outlands, stood before a wooden door. "The interloper is in there?"

"Yes," the author replied. "You're going to have to go alone, though."

"Why?" Remus asked.

"She doesn't like having three or more people in a conversation at the same time," he said. "Gets confusing."

Remus shrugged at that and knocked.

"Come in," an irrationally high voice said, like she was trying to not show her true self. That initial impression remained with Remus as he let himself in, finding someone was hiding under a blanket, only a pair of hands typing at a keyboard visible.

"Interloper? I've come to ask for a favor."

"I know," the interloper replied. "You want to return to your most recent universe."

The room was silent for a moment until Remus broke it. "Are you going to send me back?"

"I'd love to. But I'm afraid I'm blocked."

"Blocked?" Remus asked. "How? What's stopping you?" This sounded like a setup for some sort of quest, and though he didn't much care for the idea of fetching something, he'd do it. Getting back to his revised timeline was more important than just about anything right now.

"My own mind," the interloper replied, motioning towards the top of her blanketed form. "I could absolutely send you back, but I don't have a clue as to what to do with you right now."

"So why don't you send me back and let me figure out what to do on my own?"

The interloper chuckled sadly. "You can't. You can't do anything without me allowing you to do it. The moment I leave you, you will truly be a part of the Well of Lost Plots."

"So I get to be with Lysander and the  _Hairy Snout_  author?" Remus asked. It wasn't anything close to what he expected to end up with when he'd first traveled to the past, but maybe he could transform the Well into a decent place with enough hard work. He'd just have to exercise his imagination a lot to give it much-needed detail. And somehow convince everyone to go along with it. Maybe he'd even find his own way back to reality without dealing with the usual routes.

"What you have seen of the Well so far could best be described as the Theme Park Version," the interloper said. "It looks  _m_ _uch_  happier than what's waiting for you."

"There's nothing at all in the Well except people who make pointless theories with one another," Remus pointed out, keeping quiet about the plans forming in his mind. "What's worse than that?"

"You don't know what it will be like to live in a perpetual state of near non-existence. It will be horrible—worse than what I left George with," she said with a regretfulness in her voice that made Remus wonder what  _did_  happen to Old George. "When an interloper exists, the Well can connect everyone together, but whenever an interloper abandons them, the Well is only absolute isolation and stagnation. And the only thing I can do to you right now is abandon you to this oblivion."

"Can't I do anything to stop this?" Remus asked. He  _needed_  to exist, in some way, as  _someone_  that had meaning. Even if was just to sacrifice his life, that would be enough. "Just send me back—I can find all of Voldemort's Horcruxes and stop the war. And if not that, I'll help make the world better for werewolves. At least I can give the Prewett twins the ability to time-travel. There's so much I could do if you'd just  _let me_!"

"I know you have a lot of potential," the interloper said. "But I simply cannot be the one to send you to accomplish what you need to, not anymore. I just...lean towards sucking when I'm this far away from Harry's school years."

"Then how did you help all of those other time-travelers?" Remus asked. "After George and Lysander there were  _centuries_  of people you took care of."

"I didn't help anyone else," the interloper said. "Everyone just thinks I did. I didn't even really help Lysander. There's a reason he's stuck in the Well now."

"Will you at least tell me that story before I disappear forever?" Remus asked, trying to delay the inevitable as long as possible.

"No," the interloper said. "Because I don't know it myself."

"How can you  _not_  know?"

"An interloper does not have to weave every path. Much could be left to implication."

"Then 'imply' that I go back and do everything I need to do," Remus said. Why was the interloper so insistent about this?

"And what do you need to do? Dumbledore is able to carry on the Horcrux Hunt alone, Greyback is in Ministry custody, you've given werewolves the Wolfsbane Potion and  _Hairy Snout, Human Heart_. And do the Prewetts really need to know how to time-travel?"

"Of course they do!"

"Then I'd have to support their existence," the interloper said, "and I'd probably do worse than what I have done with you. I won't start meddling in their lives too if I'd just end up abandoning them in the end.  _Again_."

"You could simply 'imply' that I live a happy little boring life," Remus suggested. Though that wasn't much better than oblivion, it was still an improvement. He'd had his suicidal moments growing up, but he'd always pushed those back by reminding himself that continuing to live meant he had a chance to put his life to good use in the future.

"At this point, would you believe me if I gave you that?" the interloper asked.

"You could make me believe anything you want," Remus retorted.

"I don't like forcing things. Retconning Romulus into existence was hard enough. And putting you at a point where you get a happy end—or just a satisfactory end—from right now would be taking something I have not earned. It'd be like painting a smile on your face: you might think you feel happy, but you would be tainted by my irresponsible choice. I won't do it."

"Why not?" Remus asked. "Living a lie can't  _possibly_  be as bad as what you're trying to do to me."

"Remus, I've been following your thought processes. You want to not die because you want to do something more. I cannot guarantee that you'll ever do anything again, but if I were to give you a false ending right now, then you'd be just as stuck as if you were in the Well and it'd be as permanent as death. This way, though, your potential remains. I may not be able to do anything with it now, but someday I might be. Or another interloper may figure out your destiny. I don't know. Can you believe that I will at least  _try_  to return and give you everything that your story deserves?"

Remus was quiet a moment, thinking it over. Finally, he said, "if all you need is belief, then I guess I believe in you."

The interloper chuckled to herself. "All the belief in all the multiverses does not revive an abandoned fic. But it's still nice to hear you say that, nonetheless. Even if you're just a figment of my imagination."

And with that, everything ceased to exist.

* * *

The End. (?)


End file.
